Walking into the Ocean

 While sitting in the sand by the ocean a young mom with a toddler walked up and parked her stroller beside me. I watched as the mom diapered her child while standing up. I wanted to applaud her dexterity but thought that might freak her out so I just watched her and the other beach goers from a place of stillness and contentment on this beautiful day by the ocean. Her little boy toddled to the shore and put his feet into the vast rolling ocean. All the boy could see in front of him was the dark blue green ocean expanding to the blue sky, all he could hear was the roar of the waves and all he could feel was the warm, salty water. A less confident mother might have swooped him up from the ocean’s dangers and brought him safely to shore. This mother stood behind her boy, not in front of him. If he needed her she was there but she didn’t get in the way of his experiencing this limitless world.

Very few of us had mothers with the presence and confidence to allow us to walk into the ocean. These little experiences, these early moments by the ocean, make up our way of being in the world. But we don’t always get, and are not always able to provide our children with, perfect beginnings. I remember wanting to provide my daughter with a sense of freedom and trust in the world and soon realized this was not always possible. I had so many things to untangle in my own life and the world surrounding me was not the natural world I longed for but one filled with people working out their own twisted karmas. Seeing this mom on the beach reminded me what growing up confident can look like. Still, our lack of trust in the world around us, our loneliness, unbalanced relationships, career misses and health issues are essential aspects of our awakening. These challenges can grow our depth and enable us to develop compassion. Now, as I sit by the ocean watching people playing with their kids on the beach and couples walking by, I don’t feel alone or lacking in confidence. Fellow life forms are everywhere. Feeling lonely is more about creating a distance between myself and life just the way it is. I imagined I was separate from others but that was an illusion.

As we begin 2023 we have a fresh opportunity to open a bit more to life, just as it is right now, and expand from there. Just like when we meditate, the process begins with accepting things as they are, realizing that everything in our personal evolution has led up to this moment, the moment is perfectly designed for us. We imagine, what if we are exactly where we need to be right now, with the exact right people? What if we can accept our fate, look into that vast ocean, and move forward from there?

So here is my wish for you, dear friends, as we enter a new year. May you have confidence that you are exactly where you need to be on your path, embracing all the gifts and challenges custom designed for your awakening. May you walk into the ocean and not fear its vastness. May you see every person that enters your life-the checkout cashier, the person walking their dog, the dear friend sending you an invitation to visit, and the friend not ready to open her heart to let you in, as aspects of yourself, each one an essential part of the whole. May you see all barriers as your imagination trying in vain to keep you safe from pain and, watch as the imagined barriers dissolve from the light of your awareness and your life opens up to fullness and inter connectedness. May everything that is not love melt, evaporate, dissolve and may we meet one another in that place in this new year.