Small Seeds

Do not take lightly small good deeds,

Believing they can hardly help:

For drops of water one by one

In time can fill a giant pot.

Patrul Rinpoche

I got an offer from a foster care agency to be a secret Santa for their children. A number of years ago my home was an emergency shelter to children who were taken out of their homes due to abuse or neglect and I feel a special connection to these kids.  I picked one child from each of the three age groups and bought presents for them.  A 5 year old boy wanted a toy dump truck and a 15 year old girl wanted a Sephora gift card. But the wish that stopped me in my tracks was an 11 year old boy who wished for hair care products for black hair. This request is something my granddaughter puts on a shopping list, not her wish list. There was something about that ask that touched me deeply. I wanted to do more. It started a tsunami of possible ways to support the children. I found a guitar that was not being used and asked if there was a child who would like a guitar, and offered to teach them how to play it. I told them I have many wonderful children’s books and could come read to the children and bring my dog Max with me who is like a big teddy bear. He’s too wonderful not to be shared. These small gestures will not solve the problem of income inequity, parental drug abuse or child hunger. But who knows what sort of ripple effect these small offerings will set in motion.

We humans have a tendency to compare ourselves to one another. We set what we have to offer the world up against the contributions of Gandhi, Father Greg Boyles of Homeboy Industries or Mother Theresa and feel deflated thinking that our gifts are insignificant. But we can’t know all the effects our actions will have.  There is a dedication I make after morning meditation:

May whatever I have done, no matter how small, have a ripple effect and influence the lives of other beings in a positive way so they can develop bodhicitta in their mind streams and become freed of resentments, hostility and hatred. May they find comfort and ease through the practice of love, compassion, joy and equanimity.

We’re all called to different tasks, different acts of loving kindness, different populations. One person is called to take a leadership role in climate change issues, one is feeding the hungry, another housing the homeless, another ending war. We each find our niche, our passion, in all the good work that needs to be done. How lovely to relax back into our calling and act fully with confidence that our efforts are important-even when we can’t see the results. When seeds are planted in the ground the farmer doesn’t stand over them to see if they will grow. She lets the seed go into the loamy soil knowing she’s done her part. Some of the seeds will be eaten by animals, some will die in the ground and some will grow to be lush beautiful plants. Some of the seeds will even endure and propagate throughout the land. This is none of her affair. She just plants the seeds and lets them go.

I used to think that I needed to be doing something big in the world or my actions would be swallowed up by the enormous need. now I see that it isn’t about how grand my action is but that the action is performed with love and authenticity. What’s important is that I push at my own edge of capacity to love and serve.

You are essential, I am essential. I honor your good heart that wants to do more, that cares about the world. I hope we can serve together with a light heart, curiosity and wonder. That, rather than being a burden, our acts of generosity fill us with joy. We may never know the full ripple effects of our small efforts. Our practice reminds us to relax into not knowing, to give with all our heart, to do our very best, and to let go of results.